If there's one thing I love, it's a good, hard fact.  There's something reassuring about a fact.   You know precisely where you are with them.  It's like "Where are you?" "I'm here".  Boom.  Fact.  Job done.

I'm aware some of you may not be familiar with the terminology I'm using, so let's start off by asking "just what is a fact?".

Put simply, a fact is something which is true.  While there may be little or no evidence to support a fact, it is still true, because it is a fact.  If it wasn't true it would not be a fact, it would be fiction.  A fact, therefore, by its very definition must be true, which is why it annoys me when people question the authenticity of some of the facts I tell them.  I mean, how low can you get?  Why not just put bricks in your shoe and kick me right in the balls?  Oh you'd like that, wouldn't you?  I bet you would.  Well newsflash, pal, I aint got balls, so the joke's on you.  Bzzz!  One-nil Davidson.

I could sit here all day and throw facts at you, but I won't.  I could tell you that Jason Donovan was born without knees, or that monkeys are impervious to electrocution, but I don't want to overfact you this early in our blossoming relationship.  Instead I've decided to present you with my personal top ten favourite facts - those incredible nuggets of truth which really grabbed me by the face and refused to let go.  Of all the facts I have accumulated, these are the ones which fascinated me the most.  I hope they do the same for you, too. 

1.  The music single which boasts the most UK radio airplay ever is "Just Say No" by the kids from Grange Hill.  Since its release in 1986 it has been played over eight million times.
   
   
2.  During a routine check-up in 1994 doctors were baffled to discover that almost 70% of "Lovejoy" actor Ian McShane's body is composed of cancerous cells.  Despite this the popular TV actor has reportedly never felt any ill effects.
   
   
3.  "Batman" creator Bob Kane was raised by dogs until the age of nine when he was discovered scavenging in upturned garbage cans by police.  His surrogate canine parents were later put to sleep before his very eyes.
   
   
4.  US rocker Jon Bon Jovi likes to show friends and family how much he appreciates them by knitting them scarves, sweaters and other garments, using his own hair in place of wool.  A Bon Jovi original bobble hat recently sold on auction site ebay for over $11,000.
   
   
5.  In Guatamala it is illegal to murder a prostitute on Christmas Eve.
   
   
6.  Former "Newsround" presenter John Craven speaks eighteen languages - two of them not of this world.
   
   
7.  If the entire population of China climbed onto a chair and jumped off at exactly the same time, the resulting earthquakes would cause climate change severe enough to wipe out all life on earth.*
   
   
8.  During a survey carried out before the fall of the Berlin Wall it was revealed that almost three quarters of West Germans were Alektorophobic, or "extremely frightened of hens".  Less than 1% of East Germans expressed any fear of the creatures whatsoever.
   
   
9.  The most shoplifted book in history is Kathy and Me by former "Eastenders" actress Gillian Taylforth.  On average during the years 1995-1997 one copy was stolen every twenty seven seconds.
   
   
10.   Hollywood action hero Steven Segal is fatally allergic to snow.  During filming of his Alaskan set 1994 movie "On Deadly Ground" a thin layer of transparent plastic was painted over his entire body.  The process took nine hours and had to be carried out every day before shooting could begin.